Have you ever stepped into an uncertainty? Or are you thinking into one? Can you imagine what will happen once you’ve landed your footstep? Uncertainty can happen when you are about to change your career, move out to a new place, start out a business, or step into parenthood season. Uncertainty in life can indeed scare you and the thought of it can be daunting. It is either make you flee or make you free. Feeling of fears can be too overwhelming that might stop you from actually doing it. Fears can range from the fear of feeling rejected, failure, what others think about you, or what you think what other people think about you. But once you decide just to face it, wear courage in on your neck, you will experience new things that you haven’t before. Then when you look back, you give yourself pat in the back because you have made the choice. And that is a bravery.
I have never imagined that I would live 8,600 miles away from home, here in San Francisco Bay Area. Not even three years ago especially for what happened in the early 2016. I just recently came back from Melbourne, Australia, recovering from mental breakdown and a failed relationship. I was also just starting to focus on my career instead in makeup and hair industry using my diploma in my hometown, Jakarta. I was just focusing on building friendships, business partners, and networking with other makeup artists, hairstylists, fashion stylist, photographers and wedding planners. So the idea of moving into a new country again and starting a new life all over again were daunting for me. What if I fail? What if I end up needing to start everything over again? What if it is wrong to follow my heart? What if everybody is at the middle of the race and I am just still starting? I don’t want to feel left behind. Fear was all over me. After a long process, I chose to face it and did it anyway. I believe that God has opened this path for a reason and I believe that He won’t leave me alone in this new journey. I completely surrender myself into His hand, on whatever plan that He wants me to execute and fulfill. I choose to be brave.
Long story short I had to prepare myself to be moving to the US within a quite short time-frame. I got a student visa to continue my study in Master in Marketing so that I could use the knowledge as well to expand my business. I stepped both my feet forward and fully dived into the unknown and just took risks, with some faith in me that believed this is the right direction. And now here I am in a beautiful city called San Francisco, pursuing my higher education, and I am lucky that I am also married to the man of my dreams.
You might be in the similar situation like I was. I felt afraid of starting a new journey. Maybe you are currently in a middle of a dilemma situation too. Whether you want to start a business, start having kids, explore a new hobby, jumping into a new relationship, move to a new town, change your career, or simply ask for a salary raise. As Nelson Mandela said, “I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” We should deal with fear. If we flee from it, it will never go away by itself. We either feel paralyzed or defeated. The only way is to face it, conquer it and overcome it. You will never feel ready to jump into a new season. But we have both fear and courage within ourselves. The secret is, “weaken the emotion of fear by starving it. When we feel fear, but act anyway, we deprive fear of nourishment and strengthen the impulse of courage inside us,” said John C. Maxwell, a leadership and business coach.
One way to deal with fear is that accept the fear itself. And just do it, face your fears! Then, you can strategize your actions by doing the things that you can control. We acknowledge that there are things that are beyond our control such as circumstances, other people’s feelings or actions. But know that you are the one who owns the control of your life so focus on that. You can control the way you respond and your attitude. “Instead of letting their conditions and circumstances be the driving force of their decisions, proactive people allow their values to determine the choices they make,” remarked Stephen Covey, the author of 7 Habits of Highly Effective People (BTW, this is a very insightful book and I recommend you to read and learn from it).
I have faith in you, my friend. You are courageous. I might not know what situation you are facing right now but I believe that you deserve to receive the best things in life, whether it is your dream, hobby or new career. I would like to close my post with the famous quote by the First Lady of the World:
You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.’ You must do the thing you think you cannot do.”Eleanor Roosevelt, You Learn by Living: Eleven Keys for a More Fulfilling Life